Imagine hurtling down the road in an unlit car at speed,
now imagine a motorcyclist coming right up from behind,
any sudden manoeuver and someone is going to get hurt.
Have you ever wondered why so many drivers like to drive without their headlights on at night? It may be due to the advancement of technology that allows the dashboard to be lit w/o the headlights on. Regardless, when my dad and I see such people, we will just find a chance to pull up beside them at a junction, and do this,
sans the screechy voice and x1.5 the speed of the action maybe. Now what do we usually get in return then, is this,
I don't know, for the ladies, maybe it's because they think that we are being cheeky and wanted to squeeze their b***s (to your discretion, both words spell the same way). And to the guys too, wow, they think that we want to squeeze their b***s too.
Now, what I am trying to say here, is that non verbal communication is all part and parcel of our lives, esp whilst driving. In my opinion, verbal communication will always triumph non verbal com as the message gets across as clearly as possible. However, certain circumstances do not allow it. To shout through the thick layers of tampered glass and to be heard on top of a Mark Levinson sound system is pure madness. One interesting point to note also, is that non verbal communication can often convey the wrong message as in this case. It could be because it follows closer to the interactive model of communication rather than being totally transactional.
I know, I should not succumb to being idols of the cave (having individual prejudices that is) but the fact is that the majority of these people are usually ladies in their tall SUVs/MPVs. So readers, do remind the lovely ladies, and the guys too for that matter, in your household to be more vigilant when they are out driving at night. (:
Also, do you think that I should wind down the window and shout across the next time, or do you have any better symbols or gestures that can convey the point in a more precise and conspicuous manner? Share with me!
now imagine a motorcyclist coming right up from behind,
any sudden manoeuver and someone is going to get hurt.
Have you ever wondered why so many drivers like to drive without their headlights on at night? It may be due to the advancement of technology that allows the dashboard to be lit w/o the headlights on. Regardless, when my dad and I see such people, we will just find a chance to pull up beside them at a junction, and do this,
sans the screechy voice and x1.5 the speed of the action maybe. Now what do we usually get in return then, is this,
I don't know, for the ladies, maybe it's because they think that we are being cheeky and wanted to squeeze their b***s (to your discretion, both words spell the same way). And to the guys too, wow, they think that we want to squeeze their b***s too.
Now, what I am trying to say here, is that non verbal communication is all part and parcel of our lives, esp whilst driving. In my opinion, verbal communication will always triumph non verbal com as the message gets across as clearly as possible. However, certain circumstances do not allow it. To shout through the thick layers of tampered glass and to be heard on top of a Mark Levinson sound system is pure madness. One interesting point to note also, is that non verbal communication can often convey the wrong message as in this case. It could be because it follows closer to the interactive model of communication rather than being totally transactional.
I know, I should not succumb to being idols of the cave (having individual prejudices that is) but the fact is that the majority of these people are usually ladies in their tall SUVs/MPVs. So readers, do remind the lovely ladies, and the guys too for that matter, in your household to be more vigilant when they are out driving at night. (:
Also, do you think that I should wind down the window and shout across the next time, or do you have any better symbols or gestures that can convey the point in a more precise and conspicuous manner? Share with me!
16 comments:
yeah well i guess in general, as a girl we'd tend to think that whatever gestures we get from guys are lewd in content. at the end of the day, non-verbal comm conveys a message so easily. just a flip of a finger and one's complete message is said. no words needed at all. the con of non-verbal c is that people tend to misinterpret it when there's no room for feedback of any kind. well, personally i quite enjoy random signs that convey certain ideas when i'm too lazy to open my mouth x)
haha. that's really funny!!
i guess many a times we misinterpret or there is miscommunication when a lot of non verbal comm is used. it is a lot easier to 'misread' the message.
hence verbal comm, i feel is always the best! haha.
maybe next time you can bring a small white board with a marker, so that you can tell pple what you wanna say. haha
hahaha! i like drew's suggestion! (better keep the markers away from him though)
anyway, one reason this may be likely to happen (in singapore) is because the place is already so well lit!
possible that people want to save on electricity?
besides, your good intentions may instead be offensive to people who feel that you should just mind your own business.
well, if the situation is really critical, there's always the good ol' one finger universal non verbal language.
oh yes, singaporeans are really rude and hostile! they always observe the myob rule and refuse any input from others. this is a show of our culture isn't it? being all proud and being in a high context culture.. plenty of room for misinterpretation no?
i guess pointing 2 middle fingers at a person is better then pointing 1 middle finger? haha. sign languages and hand gestures have become part and parcel of our daily lives. try tying your hands behind your back and talking. it'll be hard for us to convey our thoughts. and yea. i love haptics. :D oops.
yeah singaporeans really need to get off their high horses. they never seem to think they may be in the wrong and someone else is trying to help them.
i guess non-verbal comm should always work with verbal comm. this would be the most efficient outcome. however, non-verbal comm is probably good when you're rushing for time. just a quick sign and your msg is passed. whether its passed correctly or not is up to your ability to make the receiver understand
There is minimal verbal communication that can take place on the roads because as you mentioned, we're all encased inside our little vehicles and shouting is ridiculous.
Thus we have to rely on the car horn to help us command the attention of other road users and the apparatus itself has ambigous roles. When a fellow road user gets "honked", it may be because he/she probably caused the "honker" some form of inconvenience (during a jam, to hurry the cars in front) or it may be due to the road user causing a new accident and the "honker" wants to warn the offender to be wary of other cars. Hostility aside, some people get "honked" because the fellow road user happen to be a friend and they are marveling at the coincidence. And lastly, drivers do hit their honks when they are turning sharp curbs to warn the other cars about its arrival to aviod an accident.
It is but one resounding noise but has such diverse messages sent across. Non-verbal communication is definitely less precise and more easily misunderstood than we may think it to be.
Well written my friend, sure points out how non-verbal communication is so crucial and evident in our daily lives. Take a step back you see it all clearly. Once again, an issue of very subtle content. Point was brought about really well.
Very entertaining post!
On the roads where presence dominance usually equates to 'right of way', we can perhaps understand why drivers' natural tendency is to be aggressive and unassumingly unfriendly.
This definitely speaks volumes to understand how helpful correction gets mis-interpreted for lewd suggestions. It might not be the communication form, but just the willingness of the receiver to advice.
Still, you have my utmost admiration, for your intentions are noble. Keep at it! For your 'little' might possibly save a life anyday. =)
Regards,
Shawn Lee Wei Bin
As many have pointed out here, pure non verbal communication is definitely not accurate enough to convey a message across. Therefore, in order not to be misunderstood, do talk it out with the other party people!
Even with verbal cues mixed in, as in the game Taboo by Hasbro, whereby players use a mixture of that and hand signals to try to represent a word or phrase without saying the actual word/phrase, it may prove difficult for some to guess correctly. The wonders of communication!
yeah i totally agree that verbal communication beats non-verbal communication hands down!!!
it is kind of sad because people often do not realize how important it is to be able to communicate non-verbally. that is the reason why miscommunication happens. but i do not get why people can drive a long distance without realizing their headlights are not turned on.
hmm, u could follow drew's suggestion on writing on a white board but what we do in malaysia is we flash our lights at them until they realize it. then again, it's another way of non-verbal communication.
I don't think its about which is one is more important, verbal vs nonverbal. Even verbal messages needs the context for the accurate 'decoding' of the messages. Actions speak louder than words right
on the day when we were supposed to go get Cuscaden wings and a BMW X3 jammed breaks to make a illegal U-turn which caused my bike to be sandwiched under his car i gave him both verbal(the f-word) and non-verbal cues (the f-inger). apparently he didn't understand both.
on another note, i personally feel that non verbal cues actually communicate more. people can say something, but their actions and behviour can give them away. and that is why i enjoy learning about Psychology. Go Reena!
when u get that finger as a reply,i think u have got that message over and that guy understood it. He probably chose to give such a reply to save his pride.
I guess this has to do something with selection, he selected to filter your message and act as he has done nothing wrong.
amanda - yes, flashing our high beam at them can get their attention. but then again, high beaming has different meanings in different countries as well. in the states, it means that you are showing the other car that he has the right of way. sadly, in singapore, it is usually only used when you're about to ram into some irresponsible driver who changed lanes without signalling. yet another short coming of non verbal communication.
darren & zed - yes, totally agree with you guys as well. it takes two hands to clap and definitely for effective communication, both of them are as important.
We are always pissed with such people. Hope they crashed after drive pass us. But perhaps, they might have a love one in the hospital which they have to sped to see them and in the process forget to turn on their headlights etc. How differently would we react if we knew that?
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